Letters to Leslie

I made my 12-year-old class write me letters using the new vocabulary they learned. Results were as follows (vocabulary words are underlined, spelling errors intact):

Dear Leslie,

We take turns to talk to the Chinese and you are angry. I'm sorry for you. I will fill up my apologize in a box for you.

That one was from Teresa. She's known to burp loudly in class and then give me a satisfied smile. She prefers that I call her "E.T." (like the movie). The other kids are always telling me what a brain she is. She's a fun kid. Her letter references the fact that two or three times per class I bark "NO CHINESE!" which makes them giggle.

Dear Leslie,

According to the teacher I can sleep. Can the kids take turns sleep? I fill up I bag with the book I am sleep in the class. Don't talk to me. I will sleep, when you take thie letter.

That's from the one boy in the class. Every class I have to threaten to take away his chair if he can't sit up with his eyes open. Not that I don't feel bad for him: The class is 4:30 to 6:30 on a Friday and he's been in school all day and all week.

Bless you fill up wallet with blenty of money.

An excerpt from Bella's letter. I'll accept that blessing.

Dear Leslie,

According to you said, where are you from, I know you live in America. We learn to take turns to play game. You fill up more happy. You wear yellow clothes in class.

From Annie. And it's true, I really like yellow.

Dear Leslien,

According to your letter say. You have runny nose. We go to look you, I friends and classment take turns to bring fruit and food and bring fill up the wather. but we go to you home in uniforms.

That's Michelle. She wont speak English in class unless I force her to.

Betty's letter included this lovely anime drawing of me.
I'd say it's a fairly accurate depiction, except I don't think I have a klingon forehead. And for the record, my boots are flat-soled and I didn't wear fishnets to class, I wore black tights.